What do you mean by “poem”?
Is it an unlatched acknowledgment? Or is it a method to forge some sense out of the world?
Is it both? Or is it neither and something else entirely?
I'll tell you what I believe a poem is and is not,
A poem is actually an open letter and a poem is also actually someone. It is an ointment you apply for scars that hurt on the inside and it is the floor that scrapped your knee, too. It is an art and art is actually just a therapy. It is a drink but maybe it’s also not a drink. Sometimes it's also a savior and a companion, too.
A poem is them saying, “text me when you reach home.” and it is also you saying I already miss the way your hand feels in my hand, and it is admitting you miss them even though you don’t want them to come back. At the same time, a poem can be a warning and a poem can be a sign of gratitude, too. On days when you are on the phone with your friend and you are talking about your missing assignments, both admitting how scared you are while also talking about how anxiety has just been sneaking up on you so often these days, and suddenly it’s not a conversation it is a poem and then it is not a poem it is unscrupulous therapy but also it is not therapying it is just another conversation. It is like holding hands without touching, giving your loneliness company.
Sometimes a poem is you in an argument about the most trivial thing but it is not the thing in attention but something between the words, the poem is something else, it is really not even about the stuff of the daily, but rather of how your mother always seems to cook what your brother would like but would always call you to take the first serve and how your brother always seems to be annoyed of you but always cook for two when no one is at home and how your father has never really been there for you but still managed to be a looming presence of support and it is about how you have always put the blame for everything going wrong in your life, on you but still managed to be the beacon of light for everyone else in your life.
And maybe even feelings aren’t even just feelings, they are the actions and then, sometimes they are the broken clock or your ruined favorite book, and sometimes they are the ignored calls or the seen text messages. Maybe even a song isn’t just a song, it is a cry for help or just another background noise to keep you from going insane, or maybe the poem is that one song that is stuck in my head because I heard you liked it, or, “I listened to this because you send me, and now I really love it.” or just, “I am sending you this song I like because the lyrics make me think of you and it is only fair that the song reminds you of me, too."
Sometimes you are alone but you are also not alone because you are picturing them with you, and you are crying and venting to your own ghosts, and you are dancing, alone. But somedays, it is not a dance it is lying in bed, motionless and, sometimes it is not lying in bed, it is sleeping because you don't want to wait for the time to pass.
So maybe, a poem is never just a poem. A poem is my heart in your hand and a poem is you saying that you love me too and sometimes a poem is all the colors, in their brightest hue and the poem is you. But maybe sometimes the poem is, in fact, just a poem. It is the longing and it is also that one tablet of paracetamol with that glass of water they gave you without you having to ask, and sometimes a poem is indeed just a poem and maybe if you listened carefully you will hear your poem say - It's okay, I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere.
Wow!! Extremely well written and so thoughtful. Loved your work and keep it up.
ReplyDeleteSuperb work done and I'm looking forward to reading the plethora of articles that you've linked to here. Keep it up!!
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